A Walk [to Remember] in the Woods
This is istallment #9 in my several-part series, Shit I Wrote a While Ago. Another year of elementary school, another McCaig. It seems that in 3rd grade I wrote 3 of these masterpieces. Here is the first one, which includes only characters based on my siblings and people in my class, from 1994.
A Walk in the Woods
I was at camp. We had to go on nature hikes. I was with Kristina, my sister, Alyssa, who is two, my brother, Vinnie, who is five, Elizabeth, and Amy. We started at 4:00 to go on the hikes. We all ran in the woods to find leaves and stuff [ed. note: shit]. At about 5:30 it started to get dark, but we had to stay until 7:00.
We saw a baby bear and Alyssa said, “Baby bear from Goldilocks!”
Kristina started laughing so hard she fell over backward into a hole.
“Are you alright?” I called.
“No,” Kristina answered.
Then Alyssa said, “Where’s the bear?”
“I don’t know, but there’s a snake,” said Elizabeth.
“Get me out!!!” Kristina screamed.
“We will,” Amy said.
When she was out we ran from the snake; then we came to a cliff.
“Look,” Amy said, “a cliff.”
“Duh,” I said.
“Cool,” Elizabeth said.
But she wouldn’t have said that if she knew she was going to fall off. When she did she screamed so loud you’d have thought she was dying (actually, she was).
“Help! Help!” was all we heard.
Amy threw a rope down. “Don’t worry,” she called. “Grab on.”
“I’m dying and you expect me to grab on?!”
“If you don’t grab on you’ll keep falling, and falling, and falling - “
“Like Energizer Bunny with drum,” Alyssa interrupted.
“Don’t you know it’s rude to interrupt?” Amy asked.
“No,” Alyssa shouted.
“Well you should!” Amy said.
“I’m still falling,” Elizabeth called.
“Oh yeah, we almost forgot about you!” Kristina said.
“Oh yeah!”
“Yup,” said Amy.
“How rude!” Elizabeth called.
“Yeah how rude to ‘Lizbeff,” Alyssa said.
Then we heard, “I stopped falling.”
“What?!” we all said together.
“It’s a door,” she called.
We jumped down.
“Cool,” Vinnie said.
We opened it and jumped in. We started falling except this time it was a scary fall. We fall into lava and died.
Then I heard, “Katherine! Katherine, wake up!”
I looked up. It was Amy. Her face was all red and looked burnt. I screamed. As her red hand touched the wall, it also turned red. I stared at her.
Then she said, “Come on, we’ll be late for the play.”
“Ok,” I said.
The End
Wow, so Amy really emerges as the hero of this story, which is fairly altruistic of me, I guess. There were at least four Amys in my graduating class, and since I neglected to add the first letter of her last name to her moniker in this story, I can’t remember if I had actually chosen a brave Amy or not. In any case, Kristina was definitely a pussy, and my mom totally would have allowed me to take my 2-and-5-year-old siblings out on a hike when I was 8, so almost everything about this story is accurate. How much did I love the twist endings? You think someone is dead, and then BAM! time for another theatrical production. C
